Oneness Ministry

We are One

The Truth About Bullies

We have been hearing much about bullying in the schools and elsewhere recently.  It is being blamed for suicide, criminal behavior, and general pain and suffering.  Once you understand what is going on, the blaming can stop and the healing can begin.

Bullying is a vicious cycle that is handed down from generation to generation, by individuals who simply are not aware of what they do.  They are generally more concerned about themselves than they are about others.  Yes, I speak of the parents who in their struggle to survive, ignore their children and sometimes even abuse them.  Bullying is something that must be learned and it is often a byproduct of neglect and abuse.

Looking closer it is something we can all relate to, even those who grew up in loving supportive families.  Why is this?   I mean if bullies are from broken homes, how can an average child relate to this?  There must be more to this than meets the eye!

The fact is we all have to deal with bullies to some degree because it is a rite of passage!  Not that it is required, however we all have egos and part of growing up is facing the ego.  The Oneness Principle that I speak so often about dictates that there is only one, so everyone you meet is a reflection of you or an aspect of you.  Some people refer to this as meeting your dark side.  (You will find whatever you are looking for, i.e. expecting)

Have the courage to stand your ground while not stooping to the bully’s level.  Fighting only makes it worse, whether you use fists, words, or other retaliations.   What you give is what you receive!  Do onto others as you would have done to you.  If someone bullies you, calls you bad names, hits you, harasses you, etc. then your re-action will determine the outcome.

First of all understand they have probably endured the very same thing and are simply passing it along.  They are in pain also, and are venting in the only way they know how.  It is a compensation behavior designed to feel better, but unfortunately it only makes the pain worse.  Oh, it may work temporarily to relieve the pain by giving it to someone else, but since this is a circle it only comes back!  And usually it has picked up momentum and hurts worse.  It can be a dead end street that leads to drastic places, like prison, and suicide for both the bully and the “victim”.

There are no victims my friends, only volunteers!  The victim mentality is of the ego and serves to prove its existence.   There is no enemy here, not even the ego!  This is very important to understand.  There is only you!  The answer is Love, Self -Love ultimately, but it can start by loving others, including the bully.

Even if you cannot forgive the bully at first, simply withhold judgment or any action and know they simply are crying out for love and do not understand what is really going on.  No action is necessary, but if you feel the need then stand up for yourself and seek assistance from someone in authority, a teacher, parent, policeman, counselor, or adult friend.  Maturity is what the situation demands.  Talking about the situation can be a great relief.  Understand that you are not alone.  Seek and ye shall find.  Remember the bully needs more help than you do!

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity     FREE eBooks! Click Here


Leave a comment »

Bullying Is Nothing New

Bullying happens at all ages, but during the teenage years it is especially difficult to handle because this is too young to have developed good coping skills.  So in keeping with the theme of this blog, I would like to share my perspective on bullying.  When President Obama makes a public plea to the American people to put a stop to bullying, you know the issue has grown to a level that needs attention. 

The recent suicides that have made the news are nothing new, although they are tragic.  The reality is that teens are susceptible to suicide whether they are LBGT or not, but it is actually the elderly that have the highest rate of suicide.  While it is good to look at this issue and yes all children should be able to grow up in an environment free of bullying.  The core issue here is not bullying, but respect for Life itself!  Our children need to be taught to respect all life and to understand that everything they do, even little “jokes” are harmful when taken the wrong way or when they are allowed to get out of hand.  For every action there is an equal and opposite re-action!  The simple laws of physics can be applied. 

When statistics are consulted the evidence shows that the middle age (45-54) and elderly years (75+) are the most likely time for suicide per the World Health Organization in a 2005 survey.  The LGBT suicide rate is reported to be 2-3 times higher than average for teens from a study reported in 1999, although to me that seems a little out of date being at least 11 years old.  The point of the statistics here is to point out the issue is not new, but is just getting well deserved press and exposure.  The rules have not changed and our reactions should be the same regardless of what the world throws at you.  Do onto others what you would have done onto you!  Children do not always think about such things, so it is up to adults to model this for them, to remind them in a loving manner that everyone has feelings and to make them accountable so the lessons stick.  Compassion can be used in all means of discipline!  It is important to keep the wounding to a minimum when facing these issues. 

Suicide attempts are a cry for help and it is help we need to be offering, not drugs or punishment.  These kids need our Love and Compassion!  They need support and someone to show them there is nothing wrong with them.  Being Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, or Transgender is not abnormal, weird or anything of such.  It is a normal biological variant in the mammalian species and other species as well.  The law of probability shows that anything that is possible will eventually occur.  Certain conditions occur more than others.  Our differences are not to be condemned but celebrated!  We are each special in our own way, this is our gift to the world!  See this in another, like in the movie Avatar, “I SEE YOU”!  See the value that each person possess and celebrate it, acknowledge it, accept it. 

The answers always lay within, so to help another help yourself first by Loving yourself for who you are, no matter what that may be.  Then you have the basis to share from.  Everything you do is setting an example for someone else, so teach with your actions by accepting and loving everyone you meet just as they are!  It is only as hard as you say it is.  Life is Simple, easy is up to you!

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Leave a comment »