Oneness Ministry

We are One

It’s Not About Surgery

Anyone in the Transgender community knows what the treatment for Gender Dysphoria is.  As stated by WPATH, Treatment for gender dysphoria varies with severity of symptoms, but may include counseling, crossdressing, contra-hormone therapy, and surgery.  Here is an article which explains the nuances quite well.  It is so very important to emphasize the counseling rather than the surgery in my opinion for several reasons.  This obviously will be different for each person, so take this with a grain of salt.

The Transgender journey to me is all about acceptance, both of who you are and what you have to work with.  So if someone goes out and modifies their appearance and/or function (SRS/GRS) does this really change who they are?  This may or may not help to alleviate the perceptions of the individual and those who meet this transgender individual.  From my experience, invasive treatment is really beside the point and offers nothing more than something to compare with.  Meaning, you have a different presentation and perhaps this feels good at first, but after a while you realize it just doesn’t matter.  The roles you play are different, but you are still that same person at the core (with the same mental/emotional issues).  Let’s face it, we are all playing roles in society and these roles seem to define us, but do they really? Does the fact that you are working as a mechanic or a mother or a manager really make you who you are?  Or is it the other way around?  You define the roles!  At least this is the way it should be in my opinion.  So by defining a role you decide if women are good mechanics or if hair dressers are bitchy.  You; not your gender defines the role.

So the transition journey is really about coming to an acceptance of who you are or to say it more simply, liking yourself!   We all go through this process and transgender people have just chosen to do it by way of gender.  Substance abuse is another way to “find yourself” and come to an acceptance.  There are many challenges we each unconsciously choose as our own method of spiritual growth!  You are probably engaged in this process right now in your own way.  The good news is no matter which path you choose the Universe conspires to make it the most productive learning lesson it can be.

We each define our own parameters for what is acceptable to a certain extent; however we are each a part of the whole and society is one aspect of that whole.  So why do we allow society to dictate these parameters?  Because we are part of the whole!  So then it becomes a matter of conformity.  I find it interesting that most people consider themselves non-conformists, but they are still a part of society and in their own way conforming to the greater whole (myself included).  It is my understanding that we each make up one part of this whole and that we are each different.

So why not just be this different person and stop trying to conform to a perceived reality?  This is in fact my vow, to be myself and be happy with who I am.  Yes, I was born male and yes I feel most comfortable in women’s clothing, so what?  I am attracted to loving people, not to body parts.  I wish to be loved just like everyone else!  And I wish to be that loving person within my own comfort zone, which with some effort is constantly expanding.

The point here is that surgery and hormones are a tool for an effect, but they do not change who you truly are!  If others have difficulty with your appearance or behavior that is actually their issue not yours.  Continue being your authentic self and loving it!  Why? Because the other choices are just not any fun, at least not in the long run.

Sequoia Elisabeth 🙂

Unity in Gender Diversity

 

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Mirrors of Friendship II

Transition is a long and sometimes arduous journey so it is very important to treasure each moment of Joy and each success along the path.  Doing this alone is certainly possible, but the Joy grows exponentially when there is someone who cares to share the experiences with.

Often the decision to begin the transition journey i.e. come out to your partner or parent(s) is the biggest challenge.  Will they accept you?  The real question is do you accept yourself?  The only way to know if you accept yourself is to observe how others treat you.  I know this may seem backward or strange, but this is just how it works.  Understand this… you are all there is, all else is a reflection of who you are.  This may seem odd and self-centered, but it is the Truth and it is both good and bad news.

I call this the mirror principle.  Life is often like living in a house of mirrors, and it can get pretty confusing.  This being said let’s get back to your partner who is having difficulty with your coming out news.  Each person in your life has their own vision of you… as a reflection of themselves, because from their perspective they are the only person there is!  So, be gentle with your expectations of them just as you are gentle with your expectations of yourself.  Do on to others as you would have done on to you, because they are you!  We are One.  Each person is an individuation of the whole; the One; all there is.  All those who are close to you will transition with you or they will fall out of your life.  Transition/change is like walking into a new room, if they do not come with you,… well you get the idea.

When you think about this it explains a lot about the reactions and treatment you get from others.  You may or may not be treated well, however the longer and deeper your understanding of this reality the better life gets.  Those who see themselves to be like you or see something in common are going to be supportive and understanding (and vice versa).  This is a great reason to join a support group!  The internet is a great place to look for one, or you could ask around, network with friends and if you still need help, contact me – I am here for you.  The time spent with others on a similar journey will help you to better understand yourself and give you the opportunity to grow self love.  The Love you give is the Love you receive!  Not only do support groups offer much needed information such as where to go to get the things you need, what to look out for along the path, and who can help you; they show you who you are and I find this to be the greatest gift anyone can offer!

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

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