Oneness Ministry

We are One

Feb 13

Transgender Regret

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Is it real? Do trans* individuals have regret? How can anyone know what is “real”? I have been studying this all my life. The fact is that you cannot know what works till you try it. This is why when the Standards of Care for Transgenders was first established they had a mandatory trial period. Live as a woman for 2 yrs and if this works then move on with CHT and Surgery. Yet over the years this has become less and less till now it does not exist at all. In fact the whole treatment is a recommendation only and totally relies in the judgment of the patient. While I do agree we should have final say here I also know that we are too close to see the truth.

“After de-transitioning, I know the truth: Hormones and surgery may alter appearances, but nothing changes the immutable fact of your sex.” (https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/voices/2019/02/11/transgender-debate-transitioning-sex-gender-column/1894076002/)

My comment on the above article: I would say I knew this going in, but would not accept it. It’s good that Walt got the therapy he needed to heal. Suffering is inevitable in this life, so have no regrets about that. At the age of 58 (transitioned at 45), I feel like gender is meaningless and sex is fixed at birth. I was warned repeatedly and yet I “had” to do it or would die. Just how I felt. I focus more on Spirituality now and less on the physical which does change. Spirit never changes and this is the rock I need. I am not my body, I am free….

“Yet, in hindsight, after transitioning from male to female and back again, I see that many important topics are ignored by such advice, placing vulnerable people at risk. Four crucial omissions are most obvious and problematic.” https://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2017/04/19080/ Read the article for these 4 valid points.

Alas the power of the mind. We have no concept of just how powerful we really are. It is our dream after all. Yes, I know now that life is but a dream so I “row, row, row”. Actually during transition I dove deeply into Spirituality, not religion mind you, but spirituality. I found ACIM (A Course In Miracles). A famous ACIM author refers to life here as “psycho-planet” and basically the course teaches that life as we know it is Ego, not ego as Freud defines it, but more like everything you experience. It is easy to understand how a transgender mindset can take hold in a world that hates you (because you hate yourself). ACIM teaches the Ego is trying to kill you, because this would prove that the Ego is real, that death is real. Jesus is teaching us just the opposite. The ego sends us on wild goose chases that end back where you started and Transgender is a perfect example of this. Instead of seeing perfection we are taught to see fault. We are sinful at birth according to Christianity. The world is based on guilt! ACIM teaches forgiveness, not because we are sinful, but because we are Not. Because we mistakenly bought into the whole delusion.

So do I regret Transitioning? Yes, and No. Deep down I knew the result before I started. It’s not about the destination, but the journey. I needed this journey. I needed to get over my fear of Love, my need for acceptance, and most of all my feelings of guilt associated with it all. Yes, I do have a very strong feminine drive, yet I was born male. Some say that is the very definition of transgender. There is nothing wrong with me though, and I know it. Gender and even physical sex is an ego mind manifestation. There are rules to life here on psycho-planet and one of them is sex is fixed. Gender is more of a mindset or concept than a reality. I actively seek the good in life (the dream) so I can awaken to the truth. God is all there is, there is no “me”; “I” is ego. Letting go of this while focusing on Holy Spirit is the way home. For more on ACIM, I recommend “Disappearance of the Universe” by Gary Renard. For more on Trans* Regret, just scour the internet. I found story after story, some ending with suicide and others with life going on. Walt Heyer is the later.

Sequoia Elisabeth

https://onenessministry.info/

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Dec 5

Why Did You Transition?

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transition is a process everyone goes through at one point or another on the ‘Journey of Love’.  Speaking through the perspective of one who has transitioned gender I must question this entire process and I do quite often!  Here are my thoughts on the subject, mostly directed to other Trans* individuals.

Often I hear other Trans* people saying they transitioned to be themselves or to be true to their soul.  While I do believe this is true on the soul level, it is not the reason we transition on the physical level or even the emotional level.  Let’s be honest with each other here, esp. with yourself.  Just admit that you transitioned in an attempt to fit into society.  What you really desire is to “belong”.  There are always those who transitioned for the sex, but that is another story.

This is flawed on several levels.  First off, as a member of the Human Race you belong.  As a soul body you belong and are loved by many other souls, esp. those in your soul group.  Whether those souls are with you on this journey is not important.  Connection exists always, even and esp. after death.  You are never alone.

By our very nature we (trans*persons) are a contradiction to known and accepted norms, but in some way each individual is different.  No body fits in!  So I ask you, “what is the truth here?”, “why did you transition?”  Perhaps it was to make life easier or so you thought.  Here is my reasoning: I am very feminine anyway, so why shouldn’t I just be the feminine male was born as and stop hiding my feelings.  I used to tell myself, feminine men are sexy to other women, we have so much in common and it is easy to relate to one another.  This theory was supported in two marriages which did not fail till it came to sex.  In fact, those around me also supported this perspective, feminine men are attractive… just look at how many female friends gay men have!  OK, so that is all well and good, but I am not attracted to men, but to women.  Does this make me a lesbian?  A male lesbian just flies in the face of reason!

So being honest here, perhaps you are attracted to men, but this being unacceptable in the average hetero world, your feelings have been repressed or you are attracted to females strictly because you are in a male body.  So there you have it, a female brain, male genitalia and thus the confusion!  Do we follow the brain or the body?  This is of course not including the heart which in the end really runs the show.  So no we don’t transition for sex, this is about gender after all.

Incongruency is the real issue for Trans* persons.  The real honest reason we transition is in order to attain a livable level of congruency.   I am not convinced I will ever feel congruent in a human body, but there again that is another story.  Perhaps you feel the same way.  The bottom line is simply in order to relate in a dualistic world you must be one or the other and since you don’t fit where you are, then you must fit as the other!  Wrong!!

Here is another view point using history as our guide.  Diversity, variance, and random order are the very nature of life on earth.  There is no duality, but our society has forced one into existence and when you force things, they break.  Our society is broken in more ways than one.  Can we fix it?  Do we really want to?  It really is not hard you know.  Looking back Native peoples have embrace their Trans* members for the most part as they found their way depending on their inner nature.  Each culture naturally stratifies with each member finding their place based on the greater societal structure.  So where does this put Trans* members of our society (western society)?

What if from a personal perspective you simply accepted things as they are.  If your male yet feminine, then just accept that.  If you feel one way, but are equipped in the opposite then accept this as nature’s choice.  If you are Ok with it, others will be too.  At first you will probably experience resistance but with consistency things will change and you will find congruency with not only yourself but the world at large as well.  Surgery is a tool to make the illusion of this world seem congruent, but if you do not make this shift in your own consciousness all you have done is deepen your ego’s hold on you.  So when you say you are being true to yourself, then be honest and figure out who you are!  I can assure you it is not your ego!

Sequoia Elisabeth 🙂

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Transitions

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Dec 17

Mirrors of Friendship II

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transition is a long and sometimes arduous journey so it is very important to treasure each moment of Joy and each success along the path.  Doing this alone is certainly possible, but the Joy grows exponentially when there is someone who cares to share the experiences with.

Often the decision to begin the transition journey i.e. come out to your partner or parent(s) is the biggest challenge.  Will they accept you?  The real question is do you accept yourself?  The only way to know if you accept yourself is to observe how others treat you.  I know this may seem backward or strange, but this is just how it works.  Understand this… you are all there is, all else is a reflection of who you are.  This may seem odd and self-centered, but it is the Truth and it is both good and bad news.

I call this the mirror principle.  Life is often like living in a house of mirrors, and it can get pretty confusing.  This being said let’s get back to your partner who is having difficulty with your coming out news.  Each person in your life has their own vision of you… as a reflection of themselves, because from their perspective they are the only person there is!  So, be gentle with your expectations of them just as you are gentle with your expectations of yourself.  Do on to others as you would have done on to you, because they are you!  We are One.  Each person is an individuation of the whole; the One; all there is.  All those who are close to you will transition with you or they will fall out of your life.  Transition/change is like walking into a new room, if they do not come with you,… well you get the idea.

When you think about this it explains a lot about the reactions and treatment you get from others.  You may or may not be treated well, however the longer and deeper your understanding of this reality the better life gets.  Those who see themselves to be like you or see something in common are going to be supportive and understanding (and vice versa).  This is a great reason to join a support group!  The internet is a great place to look for one, or you could ask around, network with friends and if you still need help, contact me – I am here for you.  The time spent with others on a similar journey will help you to better understand yourself and give you the opportunity to grow self love.  The Love you give is the Love you receive!  Not only do support groups offer much needed information such as where to go to get the things you need, what to look out for along the path, and who can help you; they show you who you are and I find this to be the greatest gift anyone can offer!

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

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Gender Related Transitions

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Aug 24

Transgender and beyond

by Sequoia Elisabeth

It is time we revisited Transgender, Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation so that everyone understands the meaning of certain words and concepts.  The Unitarian Universalist Church as a wonderful site (beside my own site of course) that gives a good overview of these principles, so please visit by clicking here after you have read this blog of course, lol.

First and foremost it is important to understand that gender and sex are different things and have multiple meanings.  Gender is your self-concept of who you are man, woman, transgender, androgynous or other.  Each individual is born with this, but is not aware of it till the ages of 3-6.  If a discrepancy is perceived then this awareness is often suppressed or denied in order to fit in.  I pray this is changing and from what I have observed it is.  Children are coming out and telling their parents who are actually respecting their concerns.  Cisgender is a term that describes “people who are not trans or gender variant—in other words, those whose gender identities, presentations, and behavior “match” (according to the gender binary) the sex they were assigned at birth.” (UUA.org)

Transgender and/or Trans is a person appearing or attempting to be a member of the opposite sex, such as a transsexual or habitual crossdresser.  This term is often as an umbrella term to include the entire community of individuals who cross gender boundaries on a consistent basis.  For more on terminology I cover it extensively at this link.

Sexual Orientation is also hard wired at birth and does not change, although many people now days are bisexual or pansexual meaning they are open to the individuals personality and not so concerned with physical sex.  A homosexual is attracted to their own sex and will not consider being with the opposite sex, just as a heterosexual is only interested in the opposite sex.  With Transgender individuals these definitions get blurry, so it is up to the individual to identify.  Make no assumptions because each person is different and may change their mind from time to time, especially if they are young and exploring.  The term sex can also mean physical or biological sex.

The traits of the Aquarian Age person is that of being bisexual and androgynous which explains much of the trans-revolution we are experiencing today!   We are moving from the end of the Piscean era to the new era of Aquarian!  I have spoken of this in other blogs and find that this explains much of what I have been experiencing.  I have decided not to get too drastic with my transition because I can see the bigger picture!  I am exactly the person I was meant to be straight from birth!

Does this mean I was not to transition?  Of course not!  That is the purpose of these times and my life is a mirror of the greater whole just as your life is!  All I am saying is I have chosen not to have sex change surgery.  Your path is up to you and if you have questions I am happy to assist!  Please visit the website below and explore the Gender Learning Center.  It goes into gender at length as well as sexual orientation and the different aspects of each of these.  The eBook “Sex and Sexuality” is available free on this website also.  The eBook is an extensive look at gender, sex, orientation, sexuality, and more.  So please give it a look see.   The website below lists the info in several formats -video, powerpoint, written, quiz, and eBook, so you can find what works best for your learning method.

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity     Discover Sex and Sexuality click here

 

Gender Related Transitions

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