Oneness Ministry

We are One

Jun 8

Self Identity

by Sequoia Elisabeth

For those with Gender Identity issues understanding who you are is indeed a life long journey.  When you ask that profound question of “who am I?”, take a few minutes and feel the answer.  You may hear words, but instead of listening, simply feel. 

You are the only person who can truly know who you are.  No one can tell you although they may try.  This blog is about the journey of discovery in which one explores the inner depths of their own psyche and beyond.  As you may remember from earlier blogs, the mind is simply a tool used to interface with this environment, it is not who you are! 

Neither is the body “who you are”.   The body is simply a vessel which carries us about and to experience this world in which we live.  Our body has 5 senses, our mind has 6 and together they make up a complex system of collecting information about life.  Being human is all about the experience of life from every perspective and aspect.  So what does it mean to be a woman or a man?

This is the question that leads many gender variant individuals to therapy.  The odd thing is that most people would simply say “this is who I am” while looking in the mirror at their body, and really have no clue as to whether they feel like a man or woman!  You feel the way you do, so how do you know that is like a man or woman?  Who decided those parameters? 

The transgender journey is largely about accepting who you are, how you feel and the behaviors you are compelled to participate in.  Part of identity is self expression and this is often not a conscious decision, although sometimes it is.  For a man to have the desire to wear pantyhose or other woman’s clothing can be very confusing and frustrating.  The idea of being a woman trapped in a man’s body for me seemed absurd.  This question depends on how you define self. 

You are you and the rest is simply how you are experiencing the world.  The choice is yours how you experience the world and yet it is NOT.  It is like you have made the choice to get on a particular train (born male, female or intersex) and now you are having that experience.  The current choice comes in your attitude about the ride.  Are you going to enjoy it?  Will you jump off the train?  Will you feel sorry for yourself because you choose the “wrong” train?  Have you ever started on a trip and then forget where you were going before you got there?  Then you end up standing in the middle of the sidewalk wondering how you got there?  This happens more than we are willing to admit, especially in life’s journey. 

The next step is to choose again and move on with a renewed vigor for our new goal.  Happy to just be alive!  Paying attention to every little feeling and thought.  Not judging them but just noticing them and using them as a guide to our next step.  …Row…Row…Row…your…boat…gently…down…the…stream

🙂  Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Jun 6

Illusion of Loss

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The process of transition often leads to the illusion of loss.  So what is loss?  Loss is “the state of being deprived of or of being without something that one has had: the loss of old friends.” (Dictionary.com)  It can also refer to the death of a loved one. 

If we look further at this definition we see that it involves possession, “that one has had”.  Straight from these simple words it becomes clear that this is an illusion because possessing another human being is simply not possible.  You do not own your parents and they do not own you.  This goes for every relationship in your live.  It can even be extended to other living things such as pets or plants, although the definition becomes hazier at this point.  You can own a beautiful rose bush, but if you do not love it and care for it then you will lose it.  The same goes for your best friend!

Even if you do love and care, nothing is permanent so eventually it will be lost.  What is really happening of course is that it is changing forms, and the energy still exists just not as it did before.  When you die, your body decays and “you” move on to other experiences either beyond this world or in another form right here in this world.  Often this is why we choose to have children so that our form or essence has a vehicle to continue on. 

The illusion of loss can bring profound pain and feelings of despair to the individual who believes that something horrific has just happened.  Fear is a gripping emotion that can consume your life if allowed to.  In a way you have indeed lost something and that is a particular expression of self.  We often identify with the person or object of loss and feel like a part of ourselves was lost and indeed it has been.  Grieving is expected, so please do not fight this.  Honor the life you identified with as if it were your own.  While at the same time realize that nothing is really lost it has only changed form. 

Life is always changing and evolving.  When this process is embraced and honored wonderful experiences result.  There is no way to find anything better till what you “have” is lost.  For a child to lose a parent this signals a time for the child to step up and replace the parent as best they can, but more importantly the child has the opportunity to fully express their essence, or be themselves! 

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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Jun 4

Possible Challenges

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The most difficult aspect of transition is probably going to be different for each person, however I will attempt to make a few generalizations here so that you will be aware of possible challenges along the road.   If you have an insight into possible challenges in transition feel free to comment below. 

The transition from one sex to the other can be a very emotional one fraught with trials and tribulations. Or it can be a simple process of shifting the physical body to better represent the inner gender identity.  It is important to realize here that gender is fixed in your brain before you are born.  The physical sex appears to be fixed but in fact can be altered to match the gender identity fairly easily. 

What happens to most transgender individuals is that they are conditioned by society to conform to the role determined by the organs between their legs.  Sex organs are for two purposes, procreation and enjoyment.  It is no accident that procreation is fun.  This assures the perpetuation of the species.  Whoopee 😉  The mental aspects of sexual attraction and role play are complex.  Sexual orientation like gender identity is fixed at birth, so it is the melding of society’s views with personal views that make this complex. 

The transition journey is one of releasing society’s views and living an authentic life which is true to your inner feelings and identity.  This begins with acceptance of both yourself and others.  If someone no longer wishes to be your friend then allow them that space and focus on accepting your natural self. 

In order to replace a glass of orange juice with apple juice you must first empty out all the orange juice.  This process creates a void which is to be filled by the apple juice.  The space is filled at all times, so as one leaves another fills the void.  Transition is much like this.  For a Male to Female transition as the male persona is released this creates a void for the natural persona to fill in.  Substituting another false persona, say of a certain female role is no better than the false male persona.  The point is to allow the natural persona to develop as it would have if the body parts had matched from birth. 

The best advice for allowing this process freedom to evolve is to let go and release any judgment.  Stop trying to please others and simply go with the flow.  Pay close attention to what brings you Joy.  This is best described as a feeling of contentment and gentle peace within your body, centered in your heart. 

For those with an overactive mind, release is a process of patience and persistence.  Make all thoughts OK while relaxing and focusing in the general moment.  If specific thoughts creep in and they likely will, consciously release them.  Say to yourself, “I release any thoughts of how my life should be.  I am open to my inner most gifts and allow them to express naturally.” 

I wish you Peace and Joy on your journey of Love.

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Transitions

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May 29

New Energy Paradigm

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transition involves change, but is more than a simple change.  It is a shift from one paradigm to another. Changing shoes is quite different than transitioning to a new home or a new energy paradigm.  The world is undergoing a major transition now which has many aspects.  The one aspect we are looking at today is Energy.  Our energy paradigm or ideal system has been based on fossil fuels for the past 300 years or so and the time has come to shift our consciousness in a new direction.

Renewable energy is the term I prefer because we need energy that not only is plentiful, but does minimal damage to our Mother Earth and will not run out.  The earth does have a good energy source in the molten core of this rock we live on.  Geothermal is a great source of energy and I know this first hand as I spent an entire three day weekend in a community in Alaska that runs entirely on geothermal.  For more on this site go to, Chena Hot Springs.  To say I was impressed with Chena would be an understatement! 

Most of us have seen the huge wind turbines emerging all over the USA.  When I lived in Maui they constructed a dozen or so wind turbines they are supplementing the oil power plant that supplies energy to the island.  This process is one of attrition and will be occurring slowly over the next 50 years or more.  The shift to renewable energy began with the industrial revolution.  In 1839 Alexandre Edmond Becquerel discovered the photovoltaic effect.  Wind power has been in use for several millennia in china and other countries around the world.  With the advent of electrical power it did not take long before it was figured out how to produce energy from a windmill.  The slower development is the battery technology to make them practical which is finally getting to the level we need. 

Energy sources are being developed all the time and recently we have seen a large movement around the globe that is accepting the simple fact that in order for earth to survive we must stop using oil and fossil fuels.  The oil crises of 1973 set the stage for this change in the USA.  President Carter implemented rebates for solar energy in 1979 and we had another surge toward change.  More recently we have seen volatile changes in oil supply and the effects of dependence on oil.  The spill in the Gulf of Mexico is a loud signal that we have an energy crisis in the world and need to put all our efforts into shifting to renewable energy.  The power regimes of the past are failing and smaller more diverse companies are emerging as contributors to the new energy paradigm.  It is our responsibility to participate in this transition from fossil fuels to renewable energy. 

If you do an internet search for renewable energy or simply read some of the articles I have linked here on this blog you will get an idea about what is available.  Certain areas are better equipped for solar and for wind, however there is some form of renewable energy available everywhere.  The Tennessee Valley Authority has been using hydroelectric energy for decades, and China just installed the largest dam in the world to produce hydroelectric for its growing population. 

Consumers run this economy by the demand they have for products.  We really do have more power than most understand.  Your available choices to buy energy from a company that supplies renewable energy is growing every day.  Some companies are offering an exchange program where they will install solar panels to your roof and allow you to use the energy while they take the left over.  Look for new programs in your area and if they are not available then make phone calls and send letters to your energy provider.

Cars are surprisingly a small part of the greater issue but they too are part of the solution, so please demand cars that get 40+ miles per gallon.  We have them now and it is possible to have cars that get 60-80 mpg, necessity is the mother of invention.  Recycle your old cars, update your appliances, and do an energy overhaul to your home.  There are so many ways we each can contribute to the thriving of our planet by taking simple small steps leading up to giant leaps.  This is jump time so be prepared!

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 25

Thought Word Action

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Continued from yesterday…Thought, word and action is the process of creation.  Please be aware of your thoughts and that you choose your thoughts!  At least you choose which thoughts you act on.  With all the advertising we are bombarded with every day it is important to be discerning with your thoughts.  If someone tells you that eating soap will clean your digestive system, they are technically correct, however the way it does so is not so pleasant and is potentially harmful, therefore this thought or suggestion is discarded. 

Even a person with an M.D. behind their name does not necessarily know what is best for you.  Make that determination yourself!  This is a very important point; authority is not necessarily a good thing.  Your power comes from you so be aware of that.  Sometimes it is appropriate to get help from an expert, so by all means do that when you need to.   Get several opinions, listen to your inner voice (the quiet one) and test the idea if you can.  What is “good for you” is up to you!  How you feel about it and how it affects others determines whether it is the right choice for you. 

What happens when you throw a pebble into a pond?  Ripples flow outward correct?  So what if you drink a beer, what happens?  How about drinking 10 beers?  Does this affect others?  The simple fact is that everything we do affects someone.  How about driving down a one way street backwards?  Understanding that we are all One will make these choices very easy. 

Getting drunk and starting a fight is generally thought of as an undesirable outcome.  So is eating a gallon of ice cream and vomiting or getting diarrhea.  Use that powerful tool between your ears to choose your actions, knowing full well what the outcome will be.  Do things that make you and others feel better.  This is not all about you, so keep that in mind.  Unless you understand Oneness then everything is about “You”. 

Oneness is the concept that God is all there is, so that nothing is separate and everything is connected.  The implications of this understanding are in fact changing the world as you read this!  A good way to visualize this is to see everything as energy, which it is.  Even the air is energy since wind can be very powerful.  Thoughts are things too, so as all this energy interacts our world is created.  It is “source energy” flowing through you that creates your life and your mind is the tool. 

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 24

I Thought So

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Many in society would have you believe that a certain product is either good or bad for you, so I have to ask you is this true?  Do objects control your life?  Meaning are there harmful and safe items your life depends on? These are deep spiritually philosophical questions that will in fact greatly influence your life.    

It is time to shine the light!  This is all a game, and right now we call it the game of life.  So I would like to make it clear that the game is neither right or wrong, or even win/lose.  It is how you feel about your life.  Simple huh?  Let’s look a little closer though so you know what I am talking about.

What we eat; food, dietary supplements, medicines, and drinks seem to be a big part of our lives, especially in American culture.  Your Mom gives you a glass of orange juice and tells you it is good for you, so you drink it down and it tastes great!  You feel, full, relaxed, energized and satisfied.  So was the drink “good for you”?  Yes, the drink is good for you because the drink made you feel better.  If you drank 5 gallons of OJ this might be different. 

You see a commercial on TV for a super diet aid that will have you lose weight in one month, the price is right and so you buy the product.  What you have just done is tell the Universe that you think you are fat and need to lose weight.  Ok, that established, what next?  The product arrives and you start taking it, just as the instructions tell you to.  A month goes by and you have lost 4 pounds.  Did the product work?  How much weight did you want to lose?  Did you need the supplement to do so?  How do you feel now? 

You can lose 10 pounds just by taking a laxative and not eating for a few days, however the point is how you feel about it is what makes the difference.  The choice is yours!  Some supplements do help you feel better, but why?  Is it because they are changing your body?  Or is it because your mind is making it so?  The body always changes due to a thought, so the mind is what does the deed.  How you think about what you put into your body then facilitates the action of that product. 

High fructose corn syrup is bad for me you think as you drink a soda, why do I drink this stuff?  Each thought is a self fulfilling prophecy dear readers!   Salads are really good for me and I really enjoy eating them…a smile comes on your face…a self fulfilling prophecy!  It works both ways and it works on about anything.  Some thoughts are group thoughts or mass consciousness so it is not only “you” that influence your thoughts.  Please don’t use this as an excuse to blame others however.  It is the law of attraction, what you think about most of the time becomes your reality!  Continued tomorrow…

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 20

Past, Present and Future

by Sequoia Elisabeth

When you think about it, time is a transition since we are growing and changing constantly.  How are you handling the “ravages of time”?  Is life getting easier as you gain wisdom and experience along the road?

As far as consciousness is concerned you are a point of light in an ever unfolding conscious universe.  Right now you are aware of a body and surroundings which you claim as your life.  When you wake up tomorrow it will be slightly different because consciousness shifts constantly.  Has anything really changed?  It depends on how you look at it.

As I stated earlier, nothing really moves.  Our conscious perception of this material world shifts all the time though so this creates the experience of moving much the same way watching an IMAX movie gives you the feeling of flying or moving very quickly when you are sitting in the movie theatre.   I believe this is society’s obsession with the movies.   It gives us the chance to test our ideas and experience things we might like.  SecondLife.com does the same thing in a different way.    

So if nothing ever moves and the entire world is illusion, do we age? How about our memories of childhood?  I think of it as the movie of our lives that we are viewing in the first person.  You may be thinking that this world is real and if someone were to shoot you with a .357 magnum you would be dead.  You may experience this but in reality it is like the movies.  You are not really dead!  Your body is dead and the people you leave behind will experience the tragedy; however your life will continue however you decide. 

Some people decide that they have more work they wish to accomplish in this life scenario so they go back and can enter the timeline when they choose, before the death happened or maybe on the table in the hospital ER.  This whole concept flies in the face of conventional teachings, so I can only say that once you experience it by having a Near Death Experience or an Out of Body Experience, then you will understand. 

The concept of time is changing with sciences newest discoveries.  Not only Space is three dimensional, Time is also, which means that we can travel forwards, backwards and sideways in time and space. How is this possible?  Nothing ever moves!  Consciousness creates the perception of motion, so why could it not create you in a different time period?  Once you understand that your body and your mind are simply tools you use to experience this world, it all makes sense. 

I know I may have lost a few of you on this journey.  Please forgive me if I have confused you.  I am growing now also and we all grasp what we can when we can. So I offer this information as I understand it so that your concepts of “reality” are challenged.  Question reality constantly and like any well made movie, enjoy the show!    

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 17

Projection Power

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The power of projection

If you read my blogs regularly then you know that I am a big proponent of doing mirror work.  What you may or may not be aware of is the fact that the world is one big mirror.  As you go about your day be aware that you created all that you are experiencing.  More importantly that big jerk who gave you a hard time at the market this morning did you a favor.

He showed you where your thoughts are.  He revealed your insecurities and gave you the opportunity to forgive him knowing full well that he is part of the grand design, while at the same time gaining wonderful insight into issues you need to work on.  It is actually fairly easy to see this dynamic once you are aware of it.

What may be more difficult seeing is the dynamics of personal relationships.  This is especially true for those we love and live with everyday.  When your partner forgets to flush the toilet or they leave their clothes on the bathroom floor, what do you do?  How do you handle this divine gift?  Let’s say you blow up and yell at them complaining that they are a slob and you are tired of always cleaning up after them.  You bluntly ask them “do you think I am the maid”?  What just happened here?

Obviously there was no communication and deeper than that your feelings are a guide.  Often how we feel about our partner is really how we feel about ourselves.  Projection in the psychological sense is “the tendency to ascribe to another person, feelings, thoughts, or attitudes present in oneself.” (Dictionary.com 2010)  This can be tricky, although once you become aware of this tendency, (we all do it to some extent), then your behavior will change and you will have better relationships as a result; not only with others but with your self as well.  Shining the light of awareness on your issues takes the energy out of them.  When you redirect this energy toward loving both yourself and others, the road smooths out. 

On some level even the guy in the market was reflecting your thoughts and feelings.  If someone becomes violent with you it is your own fear that is being reflected.  You are your own worst enemy.  We all deal with fear, however those who consider themselves different in some way, whether it is true or not, need to learn this lesson for surely as you are reading this your feelings boomerang. 

 🙂   Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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May 15

Polyamorous Relationships

by Sequoia Elisabeth

There is nothing more important than having Loving relationships in your life.  Just exactly how you express your love is up to you and is highly personal.  This blog is one possible way to express Love along with a few things to keep in mind when developing your Love life. 

Love is our nature or more specifically Love is who we are.  If you were to strip off every layer of your life; the appearances, the behaviors, and the thoughts, the only thing that would be left is Love or Agape.  Not only is Love the way, it is the essence of your being.  This Love is interchangeable with Joy, Peace and God.  This is in stark contrast to ego love which is possessive, limited, weak and jealous.

If you have any experience with ego love in a relationship then simply understand the difference between ego love and Spiritual Love (love and Love).  Love is based on surrender, trust and gratitude, while love is based on fear, manipulation, and ego centric behavior.  To be in a polyamorous relationship it requires that you be coming from Love. 

Polyamorous simply means multiple Loving intimate relationships with the consent of each and every person involved.  These relationships are more than a one night stand, although they could include those also.  Love is not meant to be limited and when allowed to flow freely keeping it focused in one monogamous direction is like trying to hold a handful of water; the harder you try the less water is left. 

Love as a paradigm and lifestyle emerging now in our society as the new relationship, so I will share my vision of where this is going.  I see the end of marriage as an institution.  Instead there will be soul bonds or spiritual unions which may be two people or more and their gender, race, national origin, etc. will not matter.  The government will not have any say in these bonds and offer no coercion in their formation. (licenses, financial benefits, etc.)  The Church no longer offers judgment as to whether relationships are right or wrong.   They simply support and Love their members.  They will still conduct ceremonies if the Polyamorous partners choose this, although I do not see this as being necessary any longer.   

The Polyamorous paradigm is a world based on Love instead of fear.  It is a world based on oneness, trust and free will.  No one can harm you in this world, and no one would want to.  Relationships are based on sharing loving experience and have no limits.  The relationships are all about gaining a deeper understanding of who you are and experiencing that through your partner. (Which is true today, but comes coupled with all sorts of fears)  If a polyamorous relationship is dissolved it is done in a loving and accepting manner because the relationship is based on goodness and sharing, not attachment.

Relationships are open and consenting because we each come from a place of Love and a desire to express Love.  Children are embraced and raised by the community, not only the parents.  The community is totally symbiotic and each person knows that in Loving and supporting others they are in effect doing so to themselves.  This is what Jesus meant by “Do onto others as you would have done onto you”.  

The Polyamorous paradigm is emerging now because it is time.  The world is ready for this kind of Love.  We have seen ego love enough now to know that it is not who we are.  Now that we know we are Love, let’s express this in all that we do!

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 12

Learning To Love

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Now that we know that the secret to all our challenges in life is learning to love your self, how do we go about that?  The suggestions I made in the previous blogs are a good place to start, and the next step along the road is to learn from others.

There is a three tiered process of learning to love others and it begins with plants.  Plants are very simple.  They respond to our loving care by growing stronger and blooming brighter.  You may have noticed that some individuals are great at growing plants and we refer to them as having a ‘green thumb’.  Anyone can have a ‘green thumb’ by loving plants!  This means caring for them, protecting them, and appreciating them. Try this experiment, go to the store and buy a potted plant.  Learn how to care for it and do so by giving it the water, food and light that it needs.  Play soft music for it, talk nicely to it, praise the plant for growing well and for blooming if it has flowers.  Over time the plant will thrive and you can tweak your approach and most importantly create the habit of caring for this plant.  It takes 30 days to create a habit so be faithful to this experiment for at least that long.  In reality the process lasts a lifetime.  Remember to self talk in a positive way, which means to acknowledge to yourself and others how much you love plants and enjoy learning about them.  Once you feel good about growing plants then you can move up to the next level, animals.

Pets are great teachers!  Why do you think so many people have dogs and cats?  We are learning to Love!  Fido and Kitty are our teachers.  In reality any animal can be our teacher as they will respond to our care and attentions appropriate to the animal.  I have a friend who loves snakes and others who are all about fish and aquariums.  Birds make good teachers too, so find the one that works best for you and do the same experiment that you did before with the plant.  This process will likely take much longer and it is often years before we realize our success.  The nice thing about dogs is they are very forgiving and incredibly loving.  Loving a dog could not be easier!  Remember to self talk in a positive way!  So when you feel confident loving your pet then the next step is personal relationships.

Loving another human being takes many forms and we are learning from every person we meet.  Some are teaching how not to love and others are teaching how to love.  The ACIM (A Course In Miracles) says that we are all teachers and students at the same time.  We learn from our children just like they learn from us!  We learn from criminals about what not to do just as they learn from the consequences of their actions.   This is Oneness expressed.  Everyone is learning what love is and is not from everyone and every experience in their life.

Until you learn to love the person in the mirror though you are simply a spectator in the bleachers who is teaching how not to love.  Maybe it is your turn to step out onto the field and play the game of life.  In the process of learning how to love, you become the teacher. 

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 11

Embrace Yourself

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Addiction is a dependence on a behavior or sub-stance that a person is powerless to stop. The term has partially replaced the word dependence for substance abuse. Addiction has been extended, however, to include mood-altering behaviors or activities. Some researchers speak of two types of addictions: substance addictions (for example, alcoholism, drug abuse, and smoking); and process addictions (for example, gambling, spending, shopping, eating, and sexual activity). There is a growing recognition that many addicts, such as polydrug abusers, are addicted to more than one sub-stance or process.

Addiction can be a multifaceted state of being but most often it only involves one behavior that is psychologically or physically habit forming to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma and this persistent compulsive activity is harmful to the user or others. 

The question of some behaviors being addictions such as talking too much, collecting memorabilia or habitual crossdressing are debatable as to their harmfulness or severe trauma from quitting.  It is important to understand that an addiction is habitual and harmful to the user and/or others by definition.  It is also important to understand why the addiction began in the first place.

As I explained in the previous blog addictions spring from our desire to hide from our self and this image is all a mirage.  The Divine Truth remains to be discovered by anyone trapped in addiction, so I will offer a road home. 

Do not take addiction lightly as the first tendency is to think you can handle this on your own and this is probably not the case.  Get help, even if it is finding someone to share your fears and concerns with.  It is best to find someone who knows the Divine Truth and can see beyond the illusion. 

Focus on the root cause of the addiction, not knowing how to love yourself.  Love involves acceptance which I think of as embracing the essence of who you are.  One great way to do this is to use affirmations and the other is to do mirror exercises. 

I have been making references to mirror exercises so let’s look at that in detail.  Look at yourself in the mirror and be aware of your feelings.  Direct your thoughts to the positive and say to yourself, “I Love You”.  Do this as often as you can and notice how you feel.  At first it may feel awkward and difficult, just stay with it.  Keep doing it and be gentle with the self talk.  Focus on accepting who you are. 

Affirmations are great for shifting our perception of who we are.  Use this affirmation as often as you can, “I now discover how wonderful I am. I choose to love and enjoy myself.” (Louise Hay 1998).  Once you get really good at this try looking into the mirror and saying the affirmation. 

A large part of our journey here on earth is learning to love.  This love starts with yourself and then we extend it outwards.  Often we make the mistake of trying to love others first and that will end in disaster unless you can learn to love the self, because ultimately we are all one.  So when you love your self you are loving others.

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 10

Stop Running

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The easiest thing to do when you are faced with something scary is to run away.  Fear is the opposite of love and we always have the choice of experiencing either one or the other like darkness and light.  When you turn on the lights the darkness in the room goes away, it is the same when we love. 

According to the ACIM (A Course In Miracles), our greatest fear is ourselves.  Humans are afraid to know the truth about themselves because they fear the horrible things they have been told about whom they are and how horrible they can be.  I mean Humans actually kill one another in sometimes brutal and vicious ways.  Humans kill animals and eat them.  We allow our children to starve to death.  On a more personal level we have all hurt the ones we love in some way either physically or mentally, so we must be horrible creatures!   

Are we really that horrible?  Is being a vile person a requirement of humanity?  Hardly!  Please do not buy into the illusion and certainly do not run from your self!  The nature of this reality is that our thoughts manifest in ways we are not aware of and the Divine Truth is hidden behind all the fear, pain, and lack we believe in.  Each of us creates our own reality through our thoughts so what you think about that person staring back at you in the mirror is your “truth”. 

It takes courage to look into the mirror and see the Divine Truth…you are looking at God (or your choice of deity).  The road to self love begins with one step and the mirror is a great place to begin!  Now do not get confused here, I am not speaking about loving what you see, that is just a shell and the same goes for everything else in this world.  It is all illusion and we have been born blind!  The Truth is always present and the potential to see it is always available.  You may have had revelations where you actually saw the Truth and those are gifs from angels. 

When I look in the mirror I am aware of my feelings.  I do not judge them as good, or bad I simply feel.  It is the feeling that leads you to who you are and seeing the Divine Person/Truth.  Remember you are made in the image of God. 

For someone who does not know the Truth, fear often jumps in and this is how addictions are born.  We have a void in our lives and we have no idea how to love that person we see in the mirror, much less out in the world, so we run.  We run from ourselves in a vain attempt to escape.  The pain of the illusion is too great so we find a way to escape and the method of choice these days is chemicals that alter our sense of reality.  Addictions come in many forms but they all have fear at the core.  Addiction simply means that your behavior has become habitual and harmful.  Even though you may realize that this behavior is harmful to both you and others it seems that you cannot stop and it also seems like it relieves the pain.

This is what I call a dream within a dream within a dream!  How many layers of deception does it take for you to feel safe from yourself?  Tomorrow we will continue this look at addictions and I will offer a solution. 

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 8

Mothering

by Sequoia Elisabeth

In celebration of Mother’s Day this blog is dedicated to Motherhood.  Being a new parent certainly qualifies as a transition and a quite drastic one at that.  In nine short months to be the host and caretaker of a new life is one of the grand gifts of human life.  At the same time it can be the most overwhelming event in one’s life.

Last week we talked about birth being a transition and it is, so now we are looking at the process from the Mothers perspective.  After enjoying the spiritual sexual union that plants the seed of human life, Mom gets to experience the changes for nine whole months.  Even though the child is not born yet the blessed woman carrying the seed is a mother.  Her responsibilities begin the moment she realizes that she is pregnant. 

It is up to Mom to make sure that she conducts her life in a way that supports her unborn child, meaning healthy habits of eating good foods, taking the proper vitamins and exercising.  Engaging in physical activity after discovering you are pregnant is a must because this builds your heart strength and ensures that the baby is getting enough oxygenated blood.  What you do – your baby does, so do things that are fun!  Other activities that support and encourage the unborn child are listening to music that makes you feel good.  Be sure to include some classical music like piano and string instruments because the sound vibrations not only stimulate your mind but your child as well.  Sexual activity is good for the child, so do not stop that activity just because you are pregnant.  Spend time around people you love, like family and friends while avoiding situations that may lead to arguments or bickering. 

Once the baby is born relax and let your instincts kick in.  Loving, nurturing, caring, altruistic behavior is human nature, so just follow your instincts.  To say that another way, listen to that small still voice within that speaks in your mind.  If the thought is anything other than loving then sweep it out.  Doing your research while the baby is “in the oven” is a good idea so that you will be prepared.  Getting advice from family will sort of just happen and it is almost impossible to avoid, so take that with a grain of salt and move on.  This means to use the advice that works for you and your child.  Remember that everything you do is a reflection or expression of who you are.  Being a Mother is an honor to be cherished and enjoyed!  Like everything else in life, it comes with its ups and downs.  Relish each and every moment for Motherhood is a journey of Love like no other.  Happy Mother’s Day!

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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May 5

Coming Out

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Coming out transgender is received differently than coming out GLB, except for your partner your Gender Identity has more effect on people you know than your Sexual Orientation does.  Some people may confuse the two and make assumptions, so I offer these things to be aware of when you make the leap.  Plan ahead and make sure you are OK with it first. 

  1. Be prepared for shock and disbelief, especially from those closest to you.  Think of how shocked you’d have been to learn of something like this about someone you thought you knew very well.
  2. Some will feel angry and betrayed and may judge you harshly.  Try to meet their anger with compassionate understanding.  Remember that they may be fearful of ‘losing’ someone of great importance in their lives.  Recognize that your transition may cause pain and hardship.  Acknowledge this pain and avoid being defensive. 
  3. Try to resist reacting with anger, as this will only make things worse.  Others are justified in feeling angry about your transition, just as you are justified in feeling the need to transition.
  4. At times you may feel euphoric about your self-discovery.  Caution against assuming others are feeling the same way about you.
  5. Expect skepticism with regard to the necessity of transitioning.  This is a natural reaction – treat it with patience.  These days, most people understand that being gay is not a matter of choice and being closeted is not healthy, so it may help to compare the need for gender transition with the need to accept one’s sexual orientation.  Treat efforts to “dissuade” you with good humor and respect.
  6. Be prepared for suggestions that your transition is a selfish choice.  If you feel you had no other choice, don’t be afraid to say so.  Ultimately, only you are qualified to judge this.  
  7. Your transition will be bewildering to many, who will look to you to help sort out their feelings.  If you maintain a positive, good-humored attitude about your transition, others are more likely to respond in kind.  Be positive about how you expect your transition to affect your life.  This is very important both for you and for others acceptance.
  8. For many, adjusting to your transition will take some time.  Keep in mind that you have spent much of your life dealing with these issues, while most have given them little thought.  For those who are disturbed by your transition, taking your time may help more than anything else you could do.
  9.  Feel free to offer information about being transgender, but don’t assume that it’s welcome.  Make clear that you welcome questions and are happy to discuss your transition.  Many are full of questions, may even be fascinated, but are reticent about prying.  When explaining transgender, do it with grace and sensitivity – don’t lecture or pontificate.
  10. As a transperson, you probably have thought more about what “gender” means than most folks.  Many will learn a thing or two about themselves when you share your experience with them.  Remember to be interested in their growth around your transition, just as you want them to be interested in yours.
  11. The type of relationship you establish before you come out will likely have a big effect on how the coming out is received.
  12. Some of your family and friends may celebrate your courage, rejoice in your finding yourself, and congratulate you on your breakthrough.  Don’t forget to show them how much their support means to you.

I Bless your journey of Love and offer my assistance if needed.  Visit my website, Unity in Gender Diversity for contact info and more information on transition both spiritual and gender related. 

I Love YOU,  Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Transitions

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May 3

Gender is a Rainbow

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Are you man or woman? How about male or female? Just because you are male does that mean that you are a man?  What if you have female sexual organs but feel like neither a woman nor a man?  Who makes up these rules anyway?

Think of a scale with 0 being in the middle and 100% Male at one end and 100% female at the other.  Now stand in the middle and let go.  Which way do you move?  How far?  Are you in the same place as you were a year ago?  How about 20 years ago?

Gender Identity is your sense of being man, woman, neither or both.  It is a scale of masculinity and femininity which can only be determined by you and your feelings.  How do you feel compelled to express yourself?  Which roles are you most comfortable in?  If you were to ask these questions to every person in the world, you would likely get answers all over the scale with most being near the middle of each direction and only a few at each end, but more in the middle than at the ends.

 

Gender is a rainbow of identity and everyone falls somewhere on the scale, but not necessarily in congruence with your body.  Transgender individuals often fall within the middle 50% of the chart, but opposite of their birth sex.  A person who is right in the middle would be considered androgynous.

You may be asking, “This is all fine and dandy, but how does this affect me?”  This matters because it affects your relationships and how you relate to others.  The person you meet at work or at the mall may appear to be male or female but in fact be transgender.  Putting that person into a box is the temptation and often in our society it is the teaching.  What I am asking of you here is to see the rainbow and accept it.  We all are going to have a different gender identity so it only makes sense to honor the differences while seeing the similarities.  You have many ways of relating to this person and gender is but one.

See what you have in common with the person you are talking with, meeting for the first time, or sitting next to on the bus.  Our gender identity is expressed in the way we dress, talk, and act.  If this happens to be different than you, which most of the time it will be, accept them and find out who they are before putting them in a box or labeling them.

No matter what label or box they end up in make it OK and live by the golden rule.  Now that you understand gender apply the same guidelines to sexual orientation and please do not assume you know one or the other. Sexual Orientation has little to do with ones Gender Identity!

Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Transitions

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Apr 30

Mindful Living

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transitions can be intense and very challenging of all our faculties.  Just like any threatening event our fight or flight defense mechanism kicks in and our body is pumped up with adrenaline and endorphins. Our mind interprets the changes we are experiencing as a threat whether it is one or not.  This feeling to most people feels good and so we get caught up in drama.

Being alert is one thing, but being aware is very different.  Alertness is an animal instinct that often turns on all by itself to protect the body.  Awareness though is different in that it is a cognitive process and a conscious choice.  While it is a good thing to have our animal instincts protecting us, they can sometimes get us into trouble by reacting to situations that are ultimately non-threatening.  We get around this situation by being mindful of what is happening in our lives at all times. 

Mindfulness is the state of being totally aware.  It is an act of presence and being present in the here/now.  The Buddhists teach a technique called mindfulness practice which I find helpful.  Take a deep breath in through your nose and hold for a count of ten, then release slowly to a count of ten through the mouth.  While you are doing this, be aware of your body, how the air feels moving, the chair you are sitting on, is it soft or hard?  Be aware of the lighting, the temp, and all of your surroundings.  Do this in a calm detached fashion sort of like slow motion. 

With practice this technique will enhance your experience of life and also make you calmer.  The transgender person has many challenges and changes in their lives, however it does not mean that you have to be at the mercy of the life around you.  If we embrace the challenges in our life they work to force us into a state of mindfulness. 

This is where transgender or any challenge that is always with us, often this means physical, can be a great tool in mindfulness practice.  Make your life’s ups and downs into an asset by being aware and present in the moment as often as you can.  They call this mindfulness practice for a reason.  It takes time to develop this skill, but when you do, the rewards are indeed vast. 

I believe that this is part of the transformation process and a good reason why anyone would choose difficulty in their life.  The payoff is an enlightened mind, when fully utilized.  So embrace your transition and stay aware – feel your feelings and emotions.  Your life is a gift from you.

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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Apr 28

Death, The Final Transition

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Death is a transition that many of us are either curious about almost to the point of obsession or afraid of the very mention of the word.  I for one have always been of the former group.  So let me share what I have learned in my many years here on earth. 

Before we can understand death we must understand life.  Life is a state of consciousness where you are aware of here and now.  Death on the other hand is a totally different state of consciousness.  The best example of this is when you go to sleep.  It is said by some that when you sleep that it is a form of death and that the sleep state is a stopover between two worlds.  Again the dream world is another state of consciousness where we are in touch with our soul. 

If you want to know what it is like to die – go to sleep.  I am sure some of you may have a differing opinion and you would be correct, because we each have our own concept of reality.  Again there are some good books that go into this subject of dying and life after death.  My favorite is Neale Donald Walsch’s book, Home with God in a Life that Never Ends.  In this book he states that you never do die, you merely change consciousness. 

If you knew that you never die, what would you do differently in this lifetime?  What does change is the life experience you are having now with all its conditions, situations, limitations, and experiences.  These things are changing constantly and it is our concept of who we are, our beliefs and perceptions that create this world that we see and experience.  Judge not lest ye be judged is an old bible saying that fits here very well.  Life is to be lived not judged good or bad. 

What exactly happens when we die?  It really depends on what you believe, literally.  If you believe that you are going to hell for whatever reason, then this is what you will experience.  Or if you believe that you are going to heaven then you will experience your version of that.  Perception and belief really is king and if you ever what to know what you believe then simply look around you!  You created it all.

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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Apr 27

Birth, The Ultimate Transition

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The ultimate Transition is the first 9 months of your life.  I have often wondered why we celebrate our birthday when the Big Day is conception.  I figure it is simple logistics, we often do not know when we were conceived, however our birth is a clear cut event which we can document.  So we are having Birthday parties every year instead of Conception Parties. 

Let’s take a closer look at Birth.  Our soul groups have a party in heaven or wherever you believe our souls reside before we are born to decide on where, who, and what experiences we need in the next lifetime.  We choose our parents, siblings, children and our role in life.  We also choose a purpose or lesson to experience during our lifetime.  All of this is done before we are born and I must recommend a great book on this topic by Thomas Youngholm, The Celestial Bar Food & Spirits: A Spiritual Journey. 

Your parents meet and follow their destinies.  In that moment of impassioned union where their two souls join as one your spirit enters this world in one fell swoop of compassion!  This union is sacred and has opened the door for another blessed soul to enter this world, so I ask you what is not to be celebrated about this? 

For 9 months your Human body develops and grows following the path that was agreed upon in the time before time.  Slowly but surely you develop into the person you are destine to be.  Your Mother carries you and gives you all the love you need to be the person you have chosen to be.  And then comes the day of your arrival to the greater world of life on earth. 

Birth is a painful process for both the mother and the child, although they both have angels who are assisting the momentous event.  Depending on how each person in the process views the birth is how they experience it.  We are thrust out into a cold cruel world crying from the shock of it all and spanked right away “to assist breathing”.  Only later being wrapped in a blue or pink blanket depending on what appears between your legs.  Or We are pulled into a warm loving world.  Birthed in a warm water bath and quickly tucked into a warm neutral colored blanket and cradled by both Mom and Dad who give you a loving welcome to this world.

There is no doubting that the first 9 months of our lives are the most dramatic transformative events in our journeys here on earth beginning in passion and moving through pain and glory off and on for the entirety.  Celebrate each milestone with equal Joy and vigor.  Change is good   😉  Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Spirituality Transitions

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Apr 24

Sexual Orientation

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Sexual expression comes in many different flavors, and is possibly as unique as the number of people on our beautiful blue planet.   The old school wants us to conform to the old ‘boy meets girl, girl has baby’ scenario and while that does serve its purpose as a race we are moving beyond that.  The world may appear to be a binary system with only men and women, but I can assure you it is not. 

Sexual orientation is an aspect of gender that Dr. Carl Bushong describes as “Brain Sex”.  ‘Our love/sex patterns, and how we relate to others on a social and interpersonal as well as sexual level, often referred to as our “Sexual Orientation”.’  (1995) This aspect, like gender identity, is hard wired from birth, which means our brains, being much like a computer, are programmed to be attracted to certain physical attributes, genders and personalities. 

To restrict every person on the planet, all 6.8 Billion +, to being either heterosexual or homosexual is unrealistic.  Instead it is much more feasible that each person on earth has their own unique sexuality which falls into several categories.  The categories as they exist today are, heterosexual, homosexual, asexual, bisexual, and pansexual.  There are a few other words being used but overlap these so I will stick with this list.  Within each category will be a sliding scale so that each person falls somewhere on the scale and is not necessary stuck exactly in that spot, although they will stay within a category. 

Just briefly hetero means opposite sex attraction, homo means same sex attraction, (a) means no sex attraction, (bi) means both sexual attraction, and pan means all sexual attraction.  I do not like the term bi sexual because it implies there are only two sexes, male and female.  This is the old world paradigm and no longer works (if it ever worked).  Pansexual includes everyone and applies to anyone that is sexual but not strictly attracted to the opposite or same sex. 

The whole labeling game gets a little absurd after a while because the terms become contradictory and putting people into boxes is both confining and inaccurate. For instance, a transwoman who is attracted to women is lesbian or are they heterosexual since they were born into a male body?  And what about the woman who was attracted to this person not realizing they were transgender?  Does that make them a lesbian?  So what if it does? 

The world is coming out!  We are becoming more aware of gender identity and sexual orientation, which is leading to more understanding and eventually to more acceptance.  I ask only that you stay away from the labels as much as possible and simply love the person.  This is why I like the Pansexual label best because it is defined as “A sexual orientation characterized by the potential for aesthetic attraction, romantic love and/or sexual desire for people, regardless of their gender identity or biological sex.” (http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/pansexuality#English 2010)

Who you are attracted to should not be grounds for discrimination.  Could you imagine if the world judged you on the grounds of your attraction to hair color?  “Oh you like redheads, uggg or ewww”!   Being gay or lesbian is no different since you have no business what they do behind closed doors.  LOVE the person and stop separating!  We are One, one big family of Human. 

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Apr 23

What Next Cont.

by Sequoia Elisabeth

By loving a transgender person you have embarked on a grand journey of discovery that has no bounds.  We are all on a journey to discover who we are.  In the process of thinking and doing, we see who we are not.  Along the way many personas emerge, and with each step you are closer to who you really are.  In the end we discover that there is really only one, and this is GOD.

Who you are attracted to guides you closer to discovering your inner self.  Since the world is an inside job, we must look within to find the source.  We do this by looking around us and discovering what we are creating!  It is much like a house of mirrors that distorts and exaggerates our true nature.  This is where we resort to our feelings and let them guide us because our eyes betray. 

Close your eyes and connect to your feelings right now.  I will wait.  …. Take a least a minute to feel deep inside.   Identify each feeling and simply acknowledge it.  Maybe it is calm, maybe it is anger, maybe it is affection but no matter what it is say “I see you, and all is well”.  Be careful not to judge here, but simply observe.  Make a list of all the feelings you observe and yes this may take longer than one minute, it is worth every second.  The deeper you look the more you will find, so let consciousness flow.  Now set this list aside for later use and go about your day, still making no judgments.  Anger is not bad and loving affection is not good, unless you say so, which just happens to be the next step.

Somewhere in that soup of feelings are desires and dreams.  Get in touch with those next and this can be done at any time, but usually best when things are quiet.  Notice what feels good and what seems to cause pain.  Certain thoughts or dreams will excite you and make you feel lighter, write these down.  Other thoughts will scare you and can be painful, write these down also.  Action is not required at this stage so just relax and feel.  Take your time and keep these writing in a journal or diary.  It is important to come back to them at some point though. 

The next step is to embrace these feelings and explore each one all the while being aware of your thoughts, emotions and feelings.  If you are male but have the desire to dress as a woman then do so and get help if needed there are links on my website.  If you are female but feel that you should have a penis then try one on, most XXX video stores have strap-ons you can purchase(for adults only!).  Take your time and notice how you feel along the journey.  If you are adolescent then it is even more important to take your time and not to run from your feelings.  Write to me if you need someone to talk to, I am happy to help. 

This process of looking within and feeling your feelings can take a lifetime, so do not get discouraged.  Remember it is about loving all of your aspects and simply being who you are.  Let go of expectations and relax, simply be yourself!

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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