Gender Related | Oneness Ministry | Page 11

What if?

by Sequoia Elisabeth

What if no one had any gender at all? We would still be exactly as we are now, but gender would not be a trait. Sex would still exist. We would still love one another and have intimate relationships, just without any gender attachments. There would be no taboos or societal constructs as to moral behavior.

There would be only one rule, Do no harm. This is much like the Hippocratic oath, and since this is the only rule, easier to follow. Another way to think of this rule is “do onto others as you would have done onto you”. Yes, the Golden Rule is the only rule we need.

Each person is treated like an equal, no matter what their age, sex, gender identity, race, nationality, abilities, health, religion, behavior, or intelligence. Just imagine equality! Complete equality, but also complete diversity. No two people, animals, places or things are the same. Some are similar but none are the same. What would life be like? Is this truly what we desire? Why is this not the reality now? Or is it?

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For while knowledge defines all we currently know and understand, imagination points to all we might yet discover and create.” Albert Einstein

The process of dreaming is how our lives are created. Think back over all the dreams you have had. Now consider which ones have manifest? Did these dreams serve your highest good? This may be why they have not manifest. The dreams that are in the Highest and Best good of everyone are the ones that materialize.

“Nothing happens unless first we dream.” Carl Sanberg

I am inviting you to dream of the life you wish to be living right now. Why aren’t you living it? Consider the possibility that you are living the life of your dreams, only you have not been dreaming very big. Let go and Let God.

“Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere.” Carl Sagan

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Time is of the Essence

by Sequoia Elisabeth

There is no time like the present! In fact there is no time but the present. Are you listening? The present time is the only time that exists, so are you making use of your time? Transition is one of those things that takes time. The physical transition alone will take at least three years. Hormones take that long to reach the peak effects even though changes will be occurring during the whole process.

Planning your transition in advance has many advantages and can actually save you time in the long run. The biggest mistake that people make when transitioning genders is to get into a hurry. Don’t take my word for it, talk to others who have transitioned. Relax, take a deep breath and let go for a minute. Do an evaluation of where you are right now. If you are still questioning whether transitioning is right for you then I would highly recommend talking to a gender specialist. Therapy can help you go deeper into who you are and the path that you have chosen.

Notice I said chosen, because your life’s journey was chosen before you were born! It is your job now to discover that path and follow it to the best of your ability. This often takes on the appearance of you making a string of good decisions or possibly bad ones that lead you to where you are today. Whether they are good or bad does not matter. If you are a woman in a male body then it is best you do something about it. The same goes for men in female bodies. The sooner the better! Let me stress that once more, THE SOONER THE BETTER. Ask for help if you are having difficulty facing this.

We now have children facing these issues at an ever increasing rate. This is great because the transition can be made complete when puberty is guided in the appropriate direction. The right way to do this does not exist as an absolute. The path I recommend is to have the child evaluated and after they insist they are transgender for two years solid the next step is hormone suppression. Put puberty on hold till they are sixteen or a legal adult and then they can make the proper decisions from there. Allow gender expression that suits the individual, not that meets the expectation of society.

I have a planning guide on my website that can be used to plan your transition. Come up with a plan in advance. Make sure you have money and maintain a source of income, because this gets expensive. The electrolysis can be as expensive as the surgery so be aware of that. The planning guide goes into specifics so I will not do so here.

Be aware that time can be your friend when it is used as such. Even if you have postponed this transition for many years, once you make the decision to transition, make a plan, and take one step at a time. I wish you a blessed journey!

Gender Related Transitions

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I am not my body

by Sequoia Elisabeth

What do I mean by this? You may not fully understand what I mean when I say “I am not my body”. So let me clarify for you. My body is what has shape and form, it is typing this message and it is the image I see when I look in the mirror or I look down to see these hands.

If I or someone else were to thrust a knife into my heart there would be bleeding and most likely the heart would stop functioning along with the rest of my body. My body would start decaying immediately even though it would take years for the process to complete. What happens to me when my body stops functioning? I exist as I always have and always will! Our bodies do not end till our journey is over. “Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: if you’re alive, it isn’t.” -Richard Bach This quote says it all. It is sort of like saying how do you know when your vacation is over? If your still laying on the beach then it is not. We talked in a previous blog about the car(our bodies) taking us where we need to go and providing us with the experiences we need.

So if I am not my body, then who am I? The question must be answered in your own mind. I can tell you, but before you will know, you must experience it. You can think of who you are, but that does not mean you are that, until you experience it! Let me give an example for clarity. I can think I am a woman and until I experience “being” a woman I am not that. It is our experiences that define us, but we are still not all the way to who we are. Look out and see the world around you. This is how you experience the world, with the five senses. We still need to figure out who we are.

Who is reading this message? Is it your body or the consciousness that fills the body? The “I” of “I am that” is who you are. You are the consciousness behind the individual considered to be “me”. This consciousness is individual, but it is also connected to all others, like hairs on a dog we are separate but connected. If you trim a hair, does that change the dog? Yes, but only in appearance and is hardly noticeable. If you pull the hair, then the dog is changed also, and in a more profound way, but still hardly noticeable. The dog continues to live, regardless of what we do to the hair. Our bodies are the same.

We can change our bodies and do so in order to experience life differently be it in a more or less congruent fashion. Does this change who we are? No, it does not. It matters not what you do to your body, only what you do with it! One way to know who you are is to remove all that is not you! What is left over is you. Even when your body is dead and gone, you will still remain. How is this powerful? No longer do you need to worry about your body, death or anything in this material world. What you do need to consider is your mission in this life. We are all here for a purpose, so the sooner we discover that and focus on it, the sooner our “ride” will be complete and we can move on! Just remember to enjoy the ride! 🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Painful

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transitions take on many forms and serve many purposes. Right now we are witnessing a great deal of change in the world all around us. It may even be touching your life personally. This is where we each must embrace the change and let go of what we think “should be” happening.

Pain is inevitable so attempting to avoid it is pointless. Pain is essentially our attachment to an outcome or end result. It is resistance to what is! Let pain be your friend and guide you. If you are feeling pain then this is a sign that something needs to changed or be released. For instance if you are standing on a tack it is likely that you are feeling pain and the pain is telling you to get off the tack! If the cold wind is chapping your face and causing pain on your cheeks, then get out of the cold wind. If the person you think you Love is causing you pain in anyway, then it is not Love. Take a good look at what is causing your pain and make the appropriate steps to relieve that pain.

Pain is a distraction used by the ego mind to control your life and avert you from Divine Truth. Sometimes we know we are on the right path and pain is simply a byproduct of the actions we know are necessary for our healing. Elective surgery is one example of this. Pain accompanies the changes we are making to our bodies and to our lives. Our responsibility is to reduce this pain as much as possible by following the doctor’s orders, and talking about our pain with a compassionate person thereby releasing our attachment to it. In your own mind accept the pain and instead of focusing on the pain, focus on the results or something that pleases you. Occupy your mind with a task like planning on what you will do upon your recovery. Focus on your desires! What you focus on grows so will it be the pain or Joy filled moments of Peace and Love. Don’t feel bad if you cannot get past the pain. I have been there before and another technique is to face the pain head on. Explore the pain fully, ask its purpose, feel it totally, show it you are not afraid!

Transition may be painful, but it does not have to be beyond your control. We have so many tools to assist us on the path! Pain can be your friend on this journey of transition. Know that you are Loved, beyond anything you can conceive, feel it and know it! Blessings on your journey of Love. 😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Transgender Perspectives

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Today we are going to focus on Transition from the perspective of a Transsexual. Most of the people I talk to have difficulty understanding what it is like being transgender or transsexual. First of all the terminology can be a little tricky because there is no set standard. I have a list on my website that will provide more insight to the terminology. Just click here to see the list of terms.

I speak from my heart and from my own perspective. I chose this journey for the experience of transitioning from male to female, to experience Truth, and as an expression of infinite possibilities. (Your soul chooses its path before you are born, you choose every aspect of your life including your parents, siblings and friends, through agreement) There is a quote that I just love by W. Clement Stone, “Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” I have always been a woman, although I did not always realize it. I originally believed as most of you, because I am in a male body, I must be a man. It does not work that way! We are not our bodies!! I like to think of it in terms of cars. You were given a car at birth and spent years getting used to using it, caring for it and identifying with it. Can you imagine having a mismatched car all your life? What if you alter this car to match your inner self? When you “die”, you are simply given a new car! For those who think they can cheat the system, think again, suicides go back to the very beginning and start all over, so embrace your gifts because you have many.

The fact that my first car was a convertible ’69 Pontiac Firebird is not a coincidence! I loved being able to put my top down, be free and show off my sexy body. When I was in my car I forgot my physical body and could just be me. I used to curse my human body and hate the fact that I am so different than everybody else. Not only am I a woman in a male body, but this body has been supersized! I stand 6’11” now and in college I stood an easy 7’. At one time I weighed 310 lbs. A petite woman I am not! It took many years to realize that this difference is my greatest gift. I sit here and laugh at the absurdity of the whole affair, and yet I can sense larger forces at work.

Mary 1950s

I am told that I pass well now, and I certainly feel totally feminine. My Mom was tall too so I use her as a role model. She worked as a model for a short while and I must say she is one of the most beautiful women I have seen. The pictures here of my mother are when she was a young adult. To be like her is indeed the ultimate honor! May you rest in Peace Mom.

Life is full of gifts and when we look at it from this perspective a whole life of Joy opens up. Driving against traffic is suicide, so stop! Let go and Flow with life, be yourself and know that as you Love yourself, so will others.

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Mary 1953

Gender Related Transitions

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Mirrors of Friendship

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transition is long and sometimes arduous journey so it is very important to treasure each moment of Joy and each success along the path. Doing this alone is certainly possible, but it is when we have someone who cares to share our experiences with, the Joy grows exponentially.

Often when we decide to begin the journey we are in an intimate relationship which becomes our first challenge. Will they accept us? The real question is do we accept ourselves? The only way to know if you accept yourself is how others treat you. I know this may seem backward or strange, but this is just how it works. Understand that you are all there is, all else is a reflection of who you are.

I call this the mirror principle and our lives are often like living in a house of mirrors, it can get pretty confusing. This being said let’s get back to our partner who is having difficulty with our coming out news. Each person in your life has their own vision of you, as a reflection of themselves! Be gentle with your expectations of them and this is where the golden rule comes in. Do on to others as you would have done on to you, because they are you! We are One.

When you think about this it explains a lot about the reactions and treatment you get from others. Those who understand are supportive and loving. Those who believe themselves to be like you are going to be supportive and understanding (and vice versa). Join a support group! The internet is the place to look and if you need help, contact me I am here for you. The time spent with others on a similar journey will help you to better understand yourself and you have the opportunity to grow self love. The Love you give is the Love you will receive! Not only do support groups offer information you will need along the journey such as where to go to get the things you need, what to look out for along the path and who can help you, they show you who you are! I find this to be the greatest gift anyone can offer you! 🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

A Moral Journey

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The transgender journey is not a moral issue, or is it? Morality is related to doing the right thing based on social norms. These boundaries are determined by societal acceptance and so they are constantly changing. For me this can be a difficult issue since there is no right or wrong, only what you decide to do. When we make things right and wrong we automatically set ourself up for feeling bad, because someone is going to be wrong, this is the way of our dualistic world. So what if I told you that you are always right? You are right in your own mind and from your perspective. When considered like this no one is ever wrong. There is no reason for anyone to feel bad for being wrong.

The morality of being transgender is a mute point really since it only really matters what you think of you, not what anyone else thinks. I concede that knowing you are supported and even loved by others is feedback we all benefit from, but just because someone supports you does this make you moral? I suppose it does if you consider being accepted as being right. So the issue is not about whether being transgender is moral or not it is about whether the way you treat a transgender person is moral. Are you treating this person with the respect you would give your grandparents? Transgender people are no less or more deserving of morality than anyone else and I can speak from my perspective, all we want is to be treated as any other man or woman.

I bring this up because I was discussing moral behavior today and got to thinking about the Transgender journey. Morality is no different for transgender persons than it is for anyone else, we are all human beings and how we treat each other should not include different rules for different groups. It really is quite simple, “Do on to others as you would have done on to you”!

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Creative Tools of the Mind

by Sequoia Elisabeth

In developing a Spiritual practice there are several tools that are instrumental in creating an open space for growth. The one I use most is creative visualization and I recommend Shakti Gwain’s book with the same title. I will summarize here so that you can get an idea of how to use this tool.

We are taping in to the power of the imagination by creating a vision of that which we desire. Say you need a new car and so you are visualizing the new car you are desiring, make the vision as real as you can by seeing the shiny gold paint and sleek styling, feeling the soft leather seats and firm steering wheel, and smelling the new car smell and the fresh air blowing in the window as you are driving down a deserted country road. The more real you make the experience the stronger your emotion of joy becomes and the greater the probability of the experience manifesting. Put no limits on the manifestation of this experience, simply hold the feeling of knowing that it is true.

The technique can be used for anything and for instance I used this method to assist my transition from male to female. I still use it often by visualizing my body as I know it is, I can feel my womb and I hold a vision of the rams horns which make up my internal sex organs of the coiled ovaries (the horns), and the head of the ram (my uterus), sits behind the mouth of the ram (my vagina)! I visualize this as often as I remember and it helps to set up a schedule for meditation at least once a day. Use this technique with every aspect of transition, voice, breasts, hair, face, etc.

To energize the visualization place yourself in society interacting with others and if you are so inclined creative visualization works very well in loving relationships and sexual encounters. How many times have you been making love and think of someone else? What happens to this relationship down the road? Be careful how you use visualization and intend that it be in the Highest and Best good of yourself, your partner and everyone everywhere.

The secret to making this work is to ignore what appears to be true and know without a doubt that which is true! Reason with yourself if you like and explain to yourself why you know this is true. When you have a deep experience that pleases you greatly, use your memory to revisit this experience over and over. These are each tools of the mind; imagination, perception, will, reason, memory and intuition. Consider how you use these six tools of the mind and be aware of the possibilities! If we only realized just how powerful we are in creating the life we desire, the world would be a much more joyous place. 🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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MtoF Transtion and what to expect

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The usual course of transition for a MtoF transsexual is to first dress as a woman and to socialize with your peers prior to taking the major step of CHT or Contra-Hormone Therapy. This does not need to be on a full time basis, although it can be. Socializing as a woman is very different than as a man so getting used to that aspect is greatly beneficial in both determining if you desire to progress and gaining the skills necessary to be successful. Many things will come naturally for you such as mannerisms, emotional behavior including your needs and desires, and mental processes. What may not be so natural is movement, social expectations and relationships. Transition is basically the process of breaking down our learned “male” persona and allowing our natural female self to emerge. This will be easier for some, but is a big road block for many of us.

It is important to be patient with the transition process and allow these things to occur naturally, although counseling, feminine coaching, and voice therapy do play an important part. A skilled counselor can guide your path and point out aspects that are not natural if they are not obvious and help you get in touch with your authentic self. The feminine coach is valuable in helping you to get in touch with feminine energy and develop its expression. I must say the first time I felt my feminine energy vs. my masculine energy it was a revelation! Being aware of our body’s energy and what we are projecting is very important. For women to truly be feminine for instance we do not project that energy, we simple center ourselves in it and this simple act will attract others to us. I have posted a link on the gender links page of my website to The Yin Project; I highly recommend her.

Voice therapy is very important also and I suggest that you start this process as soon as possible, even before transitioning if you are planning that far ahead, which most of us do not. I also recommend getting electrolysis started as soon as possible and depending on your age, I recommend doing laser first to clear the dark hairs and let the electrologist focus on the light hairs. Don’t let the electrologist tell you that laser is not permanent because I know that it is from experience. I have a page on this website that goes over the whole process of transition planning, so I would like to stay focused here on what to expect. So expect laser to work and with the proper hormone regimen the face is the only area to be concerned with unless you are unusually hairy and I know that some men are, that is OK (it doesn’t mean anything, unless you say it does, lol).

The hormones do a remarkable job of reducing body hair and stopping male pattern hair loss. Find a doctor who specializes in CHT for transgender/transsexual persons, because doing this yourself or using a doctor with little or no experience is setting yourself up for failure. It can be done on your own, but that is contrary to what this whole journey is about in my opinion, which is to fully and completely experience the transition. Many TG/TS’s want to jump straight to the result and if that was the way it was meant to be then don’t you think that you would have been female from birth? I can hear all the opinions flying as I write this which is great, remember this is from my experience and if you desire a different experience then make it so. More on this subject can be found here. 😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Transitions

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a Unique Journey

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Today we are going to discuss the significance of gender transition. We are each on our own unique journey and after reading at least 4 books and many, many stories about transition I am amazed at the similarity of the journey. It is like each one of us is a Monarch Butterfly but just have different patterns on our wings. The differences are important but to my eyes they don’t even amount to different species, which might make one woman a Monarch and the next a Morpho butterfly. How could it be that we are so similar? Is it like riding a Cyclone Roller Coaster where each person has a slightly different experience but overall the ride is the same? Or is it simply that we are drawn to those who are like us?

It is a Universal Law that like attracts like, so if you want to see who you are simply look around! Two nights a week I sit in a room with other transgender people discussing the journey and whatever else comes up, so is this a coincidence? I think not! I am with those who are like me and I love it! Why do I love it? Because I love myself! Fifteen years ago I would not be caught dead in a room full of transgender persons, so I feel like I have come a long way.

This journey of Love is filled with miracles and this is one of them. Not that I am in a room of my peers, but that I can Love being in a room of my peers! I must say that I am proud of myself and so happy to have reached this point. Each day is another opportunity to further define who you are, so what will it be? For me it is Love, I am Love. All else I am letting go of and I am still finding out what this “Love” looks like. One thing I have discovered is that it is unconditional and if it is otherwise then it is not Love. It feels good too, in fact it feels so good that I smiling all the time now. If something does not put a smile on my face then I do not need it. Now that is the simple life!

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Transitions

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Connections

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transitions are really coming into focus for many people these days on many different levels. Even myself who is going through a major transition from Male to Female, is experiencing other transitions also. My Spiritual transition is really peaking now and I feel like my life is totally being re-fashioned. When I sit and what TV, I notice people who are transitioning in many areas of their lives as well. We are changing jobs, careers, going back to school, eating more nutritious foods, changing the way we move around, being more conscious of our consumption, and watching less TV, while spending way more time on the computer or internet to be specific.

Now days my life is centered around my computer which I feel is a good thing and has to do with a sense of connection or oneness I get while online. Five years ago I spent maybe an hour or two online a day and now I spend about eight hours a day online, sometimes more sometimes less. For me to not be online the whole day is really a big deal and means that I am either traveling or doing something major. So what are we really after?

What the internet provides besides the obvious services is a sense of connection as that is what we all crave, a feeling of oneness. The more I evolve the more I enjoy spending time with others and it does not have to be in person, but it does require a two way communication. That has become so easy these days with the computer. I thank you for reading my blog and I truly hope you get something meaningful from all my musings. That is my main purpose to give of myself and my knowledge, to enlighten and bless others!

So think about all the transitions you are going through these days and honor them. Yes, be grateful we have so much opportunity these days. Our lives are changing in a big way right now, and they will probably get more chaotic before they get peaceful, but that is the way of complex systems. We must break the old system down in order to build a new system. We have many more breakdowns to look forward to, so just be aware and know that all is well! The only reason we ever lose anything is so something better can replace it! 😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Who are you?

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Who are you? Are you sure about that? How you see yourself and feel about yourself is very important, however it is our actions that truly define us. Our thoughts and prayers are simply one step on the path to discovering who you are. The creation process works like this, thoughts, words, and action. Each cycle of this process further defines who we are. Being true to our word and staying focused on our desire is one way to hasten the process. When we send out consistent messages combined with actions to back them up then the Universe has no choice but to manifest our dreams!

Consistency is the problem that most people face and this simply comes from discipline and focus. Always do what you say you will do, be honest with yourself first and then others, and make no promises you cannot keep.

Be easy on yourself too. We all slip up from time to time, so try not to beat yourself up. It is very true that we are our own worst enemies, so make peace now. Begin by looking yourself in the eye (mirrors make this very easy) and saying “I love you”, feel it deep within. Do this every day and see how you feel in a week. I do this on a regular basis, as often as I remember to. This may seem egotistical but it is not, because you are not speaking to the image in the mirror, but the Spirit that makes up the image. “To thine own self be true”.

So this brings us full circle to, who are you? For me there is no set answer, only the feeling at the moment. Sometimes I am Peace, sometimes Love, sometimes Divine Feminine, and sometimes I am simply me with no identity at all.

While I am not my body, my body is an expression of who I am in physical form. Yet when I look in the mirror I feel that I am more than this. I feel so limited in this body; like a prisoner of flesh. The Journey of Love that leads to discovery of our inner self can be a long and lonesome road, but it can also be fulfilling and joyful. What do you expect to find at the core of your being? The same thing that I find at the core of mine? Could be, we are one!

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Beyond Courage

by Sequoia Elisabeth

What is courage and is it necessary when confronting a transition. A transition is a change from one state, stage or condition to another, so as a person observes nature this process is constantly occurring at all levels of life. Nature does not struggle, nor does it resist. What is, is and that is OK. When viewed through human eyes however all sorts of dramas emerge as we project ourselves into the “grand scheme of things”. Are the caribou that traverse thousands of miles in the longest land migration on earth using courage to make their journey? How about the tiny hummingbird that migrates from North America to South America and back again every year, do they use courage? What about the largest living thing on earth the Sequoia tree, does it need courage to survive for up to 3 millennia?

Courage as defined by Dictionary.com is “the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear; bravery.” The very definition is restricted to humans! We are the Kings and Queens of fear for we seem to worship fear. We make movies about it, write books to experience it, share it with each other through our stories and teach it through our actions. It would seem that we are propagating fear in search of Courage, since courage is necessary to overcome fear. To me this seems like a vicious cycle and is ultimately unnecessary. Courage is not a trait that animals use, they simply respond to the urge to survive through stimulus/response.

Transition is usually coupled with difficulty, danger and pain so we automatically assign courage as the trait that we use to face this challenge. As conscious beings we make the choice to face transition without fear so thus we are being courageous. If we let go of our human nature and approach things with animalistic responses our survival is assured, but without the egoic self satisfaction we gain from doing it consciously.

Is courage necessary to transition, no it is not, however it is necessary to be our human selves operating from self awareness. This self awareness is what puts us beyond all other creatures and to be aware that you are aware is even more satisfying.

What if you were to take it to the next level and move beyond courage and face your transition with calm certainty and inner knowing? Life then becomes as easy and enjoyable as watching a good movie.

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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Spiritually Evolved Beings

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Transitions come in many forms and take us in many directions. Ultimately transitions are about growth; Spiritual Growth. Each of us is on a journey here on earth to experience this Spiritual Growth in myriad ways. Our gifts are in that we each have our own view point or perspective on this journey. Some people are taking the scenic view so to speak and others are on the fast track!

Personally I feel like the Gay, Lesbian, Bi-sexual, or Transgender person is taking the fast track and let me share with you why I feel that way. Our physical body is simply an expression of our Spirit self and our Spirit has no gender or sex, so as we evolve toward our true being the sexual self or gender expression is moving beyond any limits we have set for ourselves. The message in this is one of great joy since we are growing as a race of humans into Spiritually Evolved Beings. As we let go of any limitations we may have surrounding how we can act, what we can do, or where we can express ourselves the Spirit is freed to reveal its true nature.

As a Spiritual leader I feel it is my responsibility to share with you where we are headed and to share my vision of that journey. It is up to you whether you are willing to walk the path to enlightenment. I am not saying that I am enlightened, only that I see a path and I am willing to walk it. This path involves letting go of any stereotypes, prejudices, or habits you may have and allowing your Spirit to completely express through you. The specifics do not matter to anyone but yourself, so enjoy them and be not concerned with what others might say, think or do.

I am seeing a world of infinite possibilities where we each live in our own personal paradise, while sharing with others and in others personal paradises at the same time. Call it duplicity, parallel universes or whatever you may wish to call it, but with no limits or time anything truly is possible.

Are you living in a loving world or a hostile one? Be careful what you say, as each word is a prayer which is being created as you speak. Take a minute to relax, don’t be in such a hurry to finish reading this so you can blast on to the next blog or get to work or whatever it is that you feel is so important. Nothing is more important than this!

Now, hold a vision of your perfect world in your mind’s eye. Feel the Joy of living in this world and being your true self whatever that may be. We have had many television programs and movies to offer visions, so if one of them suits you then think about that. Often these futuristic programs were merely mechanism to show us what is lacking in our own world, so let go of any judgment you may hold about any particular aspect and simply focus on the parts you desire to experience. Piece the picture together using elements of many different visions or images you have come across that resonate with you.

Sit with this image now and burn this into your memory. Think about it often, write about it, speak about it, share it with your friends over and over till they tire of it. Do not give it away, but share it and do not allow anyone to make judgments about it either. If someone says something in an effort to step on your dreams simply smile and say “you live your dreams and I will live mine”!

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

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New Years Creation

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Now that we have glanced back over our year of 2009 it is time to gaze lovingly to 2010. Again this is something that should occupy a few hours at most and when we record our thoughts on paper, in audio or video these prayers (all thoughts, words, actions are prayers) are given form. Visualize your life and how you would like to experience it. Think of the relationships that are important to you now and also imagine your ideal personal relationship. Feel yourself in this relationship and imagine yourself engaged in whatever activity you desire. Keep things ideal and at the same time honor thoughts that may arise which are undesirable by releasing them. I thank unwanted thoughts for visiting and then shoo them out.

This process of creative visualization is so powerful and if you would like to know more about it I recommend Shakti Gwain’s book “Creative Visualization” and although it is an older book the technique is centuries old. Of course this process does not end after the New Year, but extends the year around. This works with whatever you are creating, be it a job, love affair, happiness, prosperity, etc.

When I came out 10 years ago I used this technique to manifest my dream. I was in a period of my life where I was doing a lot of introspection and getting in tune with my inner feelings and desires. What I realized was, I am a woman, why else would I be compelled to wear woman’s clothing and makeup? The activities I enjoyed the most are associated with women in our society and I could see that my nature was feminine, even though I had learned to be masculine as so many woman have done to cope with a masculine world. The thoughts and desires I had as a teenager proved to be right on and it was high time for me to start honoring them after 30 years of denial.

New Year’s is a great time to begin anew and that is one of its purposes. We can begin anew any day of the year and we do, but let’s seize this opportunity this year to think thoughts that support us, to plan for manifesting our desires and pay attention to what brings us joy. Let joy (deep inner satisfaction) be our guide on this Journey of Love 2010. Remember also to live in the moment and not get caught up in the past or future, yes they exist but only to provide perspective for our Now. Have a Blessed NOW, always and all ways. 😉 Sequoia Blessed

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

Transition is a Loving Action

by Sequoia Elisabeth

All transitions consist of change and change is about going from one state or condition to another. So just how does this happen? All change begins with thought, it is expressed through words and manifested with action. Stated backwards it is Be, Do, Have. Be that which you desire, such as peaceful, beautiful, smart, or abundant by doing things that reflect our state of being. Before you know it you have everything you desire.

Take being a famous musician for instance. First we simply be a musician which means we do what it takes to get good at making music. The more we do it and the better we get at being it the more we have of that life. It sounds simple and it really is, but no one said it was easy or quick. Transition can be simple though. How do you feel? Once you realize that you have always been a woman but were born with a male body the process of changing our bodies to match our minds is a step by step process, often completed rather quickly if one has all the resources necessary.

As hard as many have tried we cannot change who we are. It works best to change the body and not mess with the mind as that just does not work, which has been proven over the years by many researchers such as Dr. John Money. I have tried for 30 years to be someone I am not and while I was very successful on the surface, I paid the price on the inside (3 peptic ulcers, 1 suicide attempt). On my website I have a planning guide that was created to show you the path involved in transition from male to female. The female to male journey is similar at first and changes drastically when it comes to hormones and surgery.

We all desire to feel good about ourselves and to feel like we fit our bodies. Most people never question their gender since it feels right to them. The journey of transgender transition allows this feeling when we do the inner work of self acceptance as or before we transition physically. I have been working on my self-worth, acceptance and image for the past 30 years. Every experience we have contributes to how we see ourselves, behave and present ourselves to the world. The hardest part of transition for me has been leaving the past in the past and simply being myself. Habits can be hard to break and one of those is living in the past or the future while we ignore the present. The transition involves breaking down, in MtoF case the male persona so the natural female can emerge. This past year of living life my way has been a good feeling for me, but not always so good for others.

When I look in the mirror now I see the person I feel like and that makes Loving me so much easier. The transgender community is often accused of being self absorbed or narcissistic but that just is not the case even though it may appear that way. Let me end today with this thought. The world happens inside out, so we all must love ourselves first. Ultimately, Loving ourselves is Loving others, because we are all one! Oneness for those who are new to this concept is God is all there is – everything is God. By Loving yourself you are Loving God. By Loving another you are loving God. By Loving life you are Loving God! The same goes for your other emotions. Please be easy on yourself though as much of our thoughts and actions are learned and can be unlearned which is what transition is all about!

Smile, God is watching you 😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Transitions

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Post-op Regret – Who do you Love?

by Sequoia Elisabeth

The last two posts covered post transition grief and they touched on Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Now I would like to get more specific, post-op grief or regret is sometimes experienced by Post-op Transsexuals. I have been researching gender issues and transgenderism for about 10 years now and can remember stories from back in my high school days and the warnings my psychiatrist father gave me saying, if you are not happy before surgery then you will not be happy after surgery.

He makes a good point, but his view is skewed because he sees the failures not the successes. The successes go on with life and never look back! It is those who are dealing with possibly other issues besides transgenderism that end up at the psychiatrist’s office. The difference between the successes and the failures is often the same issue that all transgender individuals deal with daily, self-acceptance. Whether they have surgery or not, being accepted is an issue that everyone goes through with varying levels of success.

It seems that the transgender community has a larger challenge with this than the general population which is reflected in the 50% suicide attempt rate in our community. I have attempted it myself and have to talk myself out of it on a regular basis. Just briefly as this could be a whole blog, suicide is selfish because it hurts everyone you love. So it simply is not a choice, as my ex would tell her kids in her pre-school class. Which is what it is really all about anyway, choice! There are always other options.

So let’s get back to this issue of post op regret. There have been some very high profile examples of this such as Renee Richards and in the documentary “Almost Myself” by Tom Murray. It is strange how people love to focus on the failures in life. In the cases that I have observed, several reasons for post-op grief are not knowing who you are, not accepting who you are, and trying to be something you are not. Not all transgender individuals are transsexual. Where we fall on the gender sliding scale is a personal awareness that comes from getting to know yourself. Is it your desire to be like others so that you can fit into one of the two “accepted” boxes society has created, male or female? Are you comfortable being in the sex role of your birth body? Only you know if it feels right or not and unless you are honest with yourself surgery could make things worse.

Anyway, I think it comes down to one thing and that is self-acceptance. It matters not what others think of you, really! This is how it works, our thoughts are like a radiant field of energy and they surround us constantly, usually only about 10 feet or so, but in some situations they can be directed as far as we can imagine – around the globe and beyond. If you are holding the thought “do they know I am transgender” or whatever, those thoughts are going to be picked up eventually by someone. How you think about yourself determines in a large part how you are treated! What thoughts are you projecting? I still have much work to do, but I pass fairly easily and I am 6’11” 265lbs. I am a woman, I know it, always have been, but I have not always known it. I am not saying that I pass all the time, just that I usually do. Most people make a big deal about my size saying something on the order of “you are the biggest woman I have ever seen”. The other experience that I am thrilled about is that I rarely have anyone treat me rudely which goes for my entire life. Our thoughts precede us! When you are frustrated and angry the world knows this because you are radiating it everywhere you go, which is reflected back to us in events that usually frustrate us further. Our thoughts are a self fulfilling prophecy. We create our world with our thoughts, words and actions! More on this next time.

Blessings, 😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Transitions

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Post Transition Grief continued

by Sequoia Elisabeth

In continuing our discussion of transition grief, any situation can create grief, pain or resistance, but actual harm is our perception of what is expected and not from the actual event. Say you touch the red hot stove, your mind knows that this will burn you and then it produces the burn experience. This phenomenon has been proven by various groups of researchers and is pretty amazing when you think about it.

Noticing how you feel in each moment of your life is important. It is a good idea to do a mental inventory of your day before going to bed or at any point in the day so that you can be grateful for that which you enjoyed and for the things you did not enjoy. Even if you did not enjoy an experience you can simply accept it as another experience and release it because it no longer serves you. It is sort of like choosing apples at the market. We pick one up, look closely at it, feel it, smell it and simply keep the ones we want putting the others back.

As I mentioned before there is a simple method of dealing with the issues as they arise in our lives. It is important to develop this attitude before they arise so that it is automatic. Some doctors may call this a coping mechanism, I simply know that this works because I have used it many times. It has become a way of life for me. Here is what you do each and every time you have an experience, simply say to yourself, YES.

Yes, I accept this event, experience, situation, because I know that I am meant to be here or I would not be here! YES, YES, YES! In the process of having the faith to say yes no matter what, we are released from any harmful effects the event may have otherwise created. You see it is our attitude and belief about what happens to us that determines the outcome. All sorts of things are going to happen, that is the nature of transition, just remember that good and bad are up to you to decide and even if you decide that it is bad, painful or a disaster be thankful for the experience and choose to never go through that again. Let go of the experience in the process of choosing who you are, and stay focused on your desires while forgetting the rest! Our lives can truly be Heaven on earth if we decide that is what we desire. So open your eyes and your heart and see the beauty this awesome world has to offer.

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

Post Transition Grief and the working of the mind

by Sequoia Elisabeth

Post transition grief or some call it Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Whatever you call it, I just know that it is a part of change. Any transition involves some stress, grief and pain. Our attitudes and beliefs about the transition process will determine the degree in which we experience trauma.

The symptoms that result afterwards depend on how deep our experience went and how well we processed the whole event. One of the characteristics of this condition is an inability to stop thinking about the transition or event. Basically we get stuck looking in the rear view mirror and forget to look forward. Driving blind is always dangerous and so is not getting help when we notice that we are having a hard time letting go of the past.

The intensity of our dreams and the nature of our behavior are clues also to needing help. Usually there is a reason we are not letting go and it is often because the event brought up an old issue that has not been dealt with. If we choose not to address issues as they arise then they are put “on file” to be dealt with later. It is always best to deal with issues as soon as you can, because it is easier that way.

Let me explain “dealing with an issue”, I mean facing it, seeing it for what it is and accepting it. This can be done in a flash or it can take years! We simply have to be willing to do it. Later I give you a great method for applying this. Traumatic events are harder to process because in the heat of the event much of available data goes straight into subconscious because the conscious mind shuts down when it is attacked (or perceives attack). Then a long process must begin to bring it up out of subconscious so that we can “deal” with it. I realize that I am speaking in generalities here and I am doing so because it is important to realize that transition grief can occur in many situations that we would not even consider being important.

To re-emphasis this point, transition grief and PTSD differ in degree only. Regret for the decisions made is something different and that is another discussion that maybe I will cover at a later date. I will stop here today because I don’t want these entries to be so long. Check back tomorrow for the “rest of the story”.

Blessings 😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Spirituality Transitions

Keeping up with the Jones’s

by Sequoia Elisabeth

God makes us all different, but it is the ego mind (ego is equated with the psyche or mind of man) that feels that it is incomplete and wants to make everything the same. That keep up with the Jones’s mentality is what gets so many of us in trouble. Why? Simply because we are driven to be something we are not. This happens with gender too. Maybe you feel like you are not a “good” woman or man, but somehow inferior. You know the game, my thighs are too big or too small, my waist is fat, or I am way to short. All the comparison we make of our bodies to others is driven by this inner feeling of insecurity controlled by our ego mind. Now I am not here to bash the ego, far from it. Instead I would say that the ego serves its purpose, but it is important to realize when the ego has control over your actions. Basically I use this method to know if I am in my “right” mind (not ego mind). I simply get in touch with my feelings and focus on the area in the center of my body. If I am feeling good, then all is OK and I should proceed, but if instead I feel a tight tension, pain or sick feeling then I should re-assess my actions. I call this soul guidance, because feelings are the seat of the soul. Your Higher Self or soul is communicating with you through your feelings! Are you listening? When you are thinking of beginning a transition be it a gender transformation or a work transition, whatever, check in with your soul! One thing that many people do not realize is that no one can tell you that you are a man or woman. Gender Identity is subjective and only you know how you feel. Many of us know that we feel like a woman very early on and some report as early as 2-3 years old, however many of us do not make that connection that I have this body, I should be feeling this way! Why? We have no idea what it feels like to be one sex or the other we only know how we feel and that it is either right or wrong. I never felt wrong, I only felt like myself. I had no idea in my early years that I was a woman. I was given a male body and I accepted that the way I felt was male! Only later after puberty did I feel like wearing woman’s clothing. By this time programming had taken over and I was locked into living a lie! I did question reality so to speak when I was 17, but Harry Benjamin had just released his very strict guidelines for transition and I was a bit freaked out by them. I mean living a full year as a woman with no help what so ever, no hormones, no surgery, and even the prospects of having counseling help seemed very remote. So I did my best to be the man everyone else expected me to be. I was living in my ego mind! I would have brief moments of “sanity” when I would ‘crossdress’(which in reality was dressing properly in truth). We can only live the lie for so long before things start to break down. The feelings at this time of transition can be tricky. I was scared to death of being “caught” and yet I did it anyway because it felt so good. It just felt right! From what I have learned over these last ten years is that these urges to crossdress come in cycles and for most male to female transgender persons it runs around 15 years, and what I mean by this is that we have a period of crisis urges where we dress appropriately or freak out! Now I am fully in Transition and loving my life as my natural self! See this is the key to it all. Being yourself! Now many of you will say, Duh o.O! Not everybody lives their authentic selves, even in the transgender world some people are still living a life they believe others want them to. They are conforming to a bi-gender world, were we are either male or female. The fact is that gender is a spectrum and you can be any combination of male and female. Few people are completely one or the other. This is gender identity not sexual orientation that I am talking about. So please get in touch with your soul (feelings) and be yourself! You will be happy you did.

😉 Sequoia Elisabeth

Gender Related Transitions

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